Some of the Children Are Not Well – And Neither Are Some of the Adults

Dr. Timothy F. Johnson

Perhaps
the question we adults need to be asking ourselves is why aren’t the
children well? What have we failed to do for them? Are we providing
them with the tools, resources and training to be successful in this
ever-changing world? Do they see us as people who inspire the best in
them?


I don’t
know the answer to these questions. But after asking them, I was left
with what I consider the most important question, “Are we prepared to
correct our mistakes, take ownership of their future by empowering and
encouraging them to achieve even more than their parents?

Johnchel,
a 16 year old from our community, is obviously an articulate, thought
provoking, and an engaging student, challenging each of us to think
about his statement in last month’s paper. And this shouldn’t be of any
surprise to anyone!


Our young people
cry out daily asking important and relevant questions, seeking
understanding and clarity to a world that seems to enjoy avoiding the
questions rather than answer them. And, is it only me that accepts the
FACT that these same young people are the products of their community?
Which for me simply means if the product is defective, the maker must
assume all responsibility for they are the producers of the product,
right?


Recently, I had
the pleasure of hearing Dr. Joy DeGruy Leary speak about the Post
Traumatic Slave Syndrome you and I continue to live with. Oh, I know
there are those of you who will say, “That’s not me, I am fine.” My
response is Okay, if that is what you think. But to me that is a clear
example of the syndrome’s continued influence in your life. While she
presented enough information to take up this entire paper, what I
personally took away from her three hour presentation were two words:
Respect and Relationships.


And this is were I believe adults can begin the healing for themselves and subsequently for our children!


When we pass
judgments against our children, we pass judgments against ourselves!
Johnchel asks us not to judge our youth. I find this especially true
for those of us over 40 years of age and came of age during the civil
rights movement. This is their time.


Like many of
you, I have adult and teenage children and often don’t understand their
mindset as well as I would like to. Let us be more committed to taking
time to listen to their challenges, dreams and even expectations of us.
Respecting what they have to say does not mean agreement. It simply
means we are willing to acknowledge them as a person worthy of the time
for us to listen and try to understand their point of view.


To Johnchel’s
second point… he is absolutely correct – It is not our time any
longer, it is theirs. Yes, we want to protect, guide, and perhaps even
ensure their overall success. I must admit, I didn’t like it when my
mother would remind me of how difficult it was for her growing up. Can
you relate?


When it comes to
sharing and preparing our youth for tomorrow’s challenge, which they
will assume regardless of our preparation, I believe the safest thing
for us to do is to establish a healthy, safe and positive relationship
with them.


Today, our
African American youth are dealing with a number of challenges we
didn’t have to deal with in the past in our community: From AIDS and
homosexuality to the affects of desegregation and what was lost as a
result.


Let us all be
mindful of the challenges our offspring must deal with in the 21st
century. But more importantly let us take ownership of the world our
youth will assume responsibility for in the not so far off future.


If some of the
children are not well, then we must acknowledge that some of the adults
aren’t well either. We must begin to help with the healing of the
adults so they can heal their children and their children’s children.


From my vantage
point, it begins with showing respect for one another as human being
created for God’s purpose and pleasure. Next, we must build
relationships with each other. No one wants to be dictated to or told
what he or she must do, be, or act like. Our youth mimic what they see,
experience and hear about in their surroundings.


Let our examples be the shining light of hope. Let the healing begin!


Dr. Timothy F.
Johnson is the President/CEO of Leadership 101, LLC. A Christian based
and minority owned company, Leadership 101 is a certified Historically
Underutilized Leadership and Organizational Development company. He
continues to give back to his community through his active involvement
in numerous local and national service organizations. He holds degrees
from The University of Arizona, Troy University, and LaSalle
University. He is married to Latessa Johnson, the Director of Student
Services for Asheville City Schools.